World War Three.

"Who's your best friend"

Oh, I don't have one

"Why not"

She's long gone.

I catch myself as I spit the words

I stop and look around

It had to be someone else

My apologies come out

without sound

I taste the hate on my tongue

in the things I send your way

I listen to myself

as if I'm someone else

the things anger makes me say

I watch myself reach out

as the monster I am

I shove you away from me.

I shove away the memories

I push the one thing

that had some kind of value to me

I reach out

watch myself

as I'm someone else

and leave my best friend

Now I'm standing in the bleakest corner

of my empty room

starting at the photographs

memories of you

Staring at the one mistake

you wont let me undo

Arms folded neatly

like laundry across my chest

glaring at what I created

staring at this mess.

I stand back

helpless

as one by one

memory by memory

the girl who was apart of me

I watch each one fall.

As each smile hits the cold floor

as cold as I've been to you

I bow my head

hearing over and over

and over again

all that was spit and said

my tears are ice

they break on the floor

I don't want to cry anymore

the fighting is old

the yelling is stale

what started out as wind and rain

is thunder and hail

I regret everytime I spoke your name

the things I said in pain

as I stare at the aftermath

I'm the one to blame

look at what we've done

we're world war three.

to think we were inseparable

identical at heart

to think we sat and swore

we wouldn't be apart

When I stood up on stage

you followed close behind

when I stumbled

messed up

you gave me another try

I listened to your dreams

I heard your tears

I stood with you

fighting fears.

I remember sitting on the bleachers

when I lost a battle with myself

you looked at me and promised

you'd do anything to help

you sat that day

caught me by the eye

"I promise we won't have to say goodbye"

Secrets we whispered

promises made

days where you'd run for cover

while I danced through the rain

I stop myself mid-memory

shake away everything

I look at the phone thrown on my bed

I can press the buttons

make a call

but I stop and shake my head

you wouldn't answer me

we're world war three

flashback to the things I said

I stabbed you in the back

I laughed at you

as I headed down a different track

You stared at me

fought me back

we threw words at each other

I couldn't stop myself

I hated you.

saw you as someone else.

I watch the birthday parties

acting competitions

rehearsals

lunches

mirror pictures

I watch everything that meant something

fall

so silently.

I won't chase you down

I won't swallow my pride

I won't look at you

or apologize

but as I stare at us

ruins of us on the floor

I collapse

I don't want to cry anymore

I don't want to fight this war

"whos your best friend"

Oh, I don't have one.

"why not?"

she's long gone.

...and I want her back.