I want my pink shirt back! I WANT MY PINK SHIRT BACK.

I need new friends. Ones that aren't assholes.
I take that back, they're not assholes. As a matter of fact, most of them are really nice people. It just really peeves me when someone asks me to hang out, and then I log on to facebook and see they're with someone else. And then I'm sitting there, alone, watching Say Yes To The Dress, wondering why I even make time for you. Bitch please. The next time I'm out and about, spending my time with nice non-asshole people, and you ask me if I can hang out I'm gonna be like FUCK YES LETS HANG OUT RIGHT THIS MOMENT. Then I'll stay right where I am and not even bother to fill you in on the fact that we're not really hanging out. I hope you spend that night alone, watching Say Yes to the Dress. Writing in your blog about how much of an asshole I am for blowing you off. 
But for right now, I hope you had a jolly good time tonight. Did you have an awesome time? Did you drink awesome shooters, listen to awesome music, and then just sit around and soak up each others awesomeness? 
If you didn't get that reference...just go. 
Today I'm gonna start my mission. This summer, my goal is to get unbelievably pretty. Not because I fucking hate how I am right now, but to make everyone feel like shit. Especially my asshole friend. This way, maybe I won't have to hear another snarky comment about the way I dress, my hair, or my appearance in general.
"I don't see why you don't shop here, they've got all of those ugly-cute clothes you wear."
*Picks up XXL sweat pants* "Who am I? I'm you! You know, because you wear baggy clothes"
Bitch it's sweats.
"I can't see you with a normal hair color, it's gonna be so weird."
"She's so pretty!
...You'd look like her if you lost some of your face fat."
I was never this insecure before I met them.


And then when school starts, I'm going to get a lead in the play, and make a whole bunch of new friends so I'm always too busy for her. 
Because it makes me feel like a bundle of shit to know that I'm the last fucking person you ever want to spend time with.